Tuesday, May 31, 2011


I can't wait to watch that.  

Today I am over my hangover and feel like a brand-new person.  Now I am casually sipping some Earl Grey tea and watching the FLAVA channel.  Ghetto English culture is.. interesting.  There are a lot of random stabbings and crimes based around hoodies.  It lacks the danger of the American inner-city because it's impossible to find guns over here.  And yet, I have a huge fear of being knifed.  Ouch.  Morbid question: would you rather be stabbed or shot? I feel like if you were shot it would be quicker and less scary.  With a knife you would have moments of terror as this shining metal thing came towards you... 


Last night, after I finished watching the Crack House documentary, I watched Louis Theroux's documentary about Miami Mega Jails.  I am really into crime and gangsters right now.  Well, I always am, actually.  

Monday, May 30, 2011

Next movie for you...


So once again I find myself feeling guilty for playing hooky from our sacred blogue. I've been playing hooky in life as well. It's Memorial Day weekend in this fair patriotic country. In other words, it's the first weekend of SUMMER, and it's HOT as hell. My best friend from Italy came to town last week, and I skipped out on work to go to Coney Island.

We went a few days before the rides were open, but it was a total blast. Coney Island brews, hot dogs sauerkraut, ice cream, bumper cars, skee ball... you know. They were testing the rides in heavy fog, and it made for a very eerie scene perfect for photographs.

A friend from DC is also in town. My cousin's friend who came to the Dominican with us. There have been a few very late nights, and our days are spent wandering around doing this and that. Very pleasant and casual, and I hate the thought of having everyone leave tomorrow and my having to go back to work.

How's the extreme wallet diet going? Any new rock star sightings? Are you sweltering?

Tuesday, May 24, 2011

20 pounds in 10 days

That sounds like an extreme diet.  Hmmm..

Right now I am drinking this drink called "Kinnie" that a man in a convenience store gave me as a "promotion."  It's from "Malta."  I don't "trust" it.  It is made from "bitter oranges and aromatic herbs."  It tastes alcoholic but it claims that it is "non-alcoholic."

70 going on 20

Sweet, sweet saucy Bob. Happy Birthday to you!

And for the tattoos, yes I do think they should come from Salome. Not sure where on the body to get them.  We'll figure it out!

As long as you don't do anything but talk to me for a week, I think 20 pounds is enough. They feed you at work right?

It's supposed to be 80 degrees and HUMIND/RAINY today. Dis-gust-ing. I'll just channel Bob and keep my cool.


We need to seriously plan our tattoos...  Where is the best place to PUT a tattoo??  I think it should be from Salome.  Thoughts?

I have the WHOLE DAY OFF today.  I have no money... such is the life of a peniless flaneur.  I can't wait to get paid in about... one week, three days.  I have to make less than 20 pounds last until Sunday.  I think I can... I am used to that level of financial insecurity.  

Sienna Miller came into work yesterday and she is the most bland-looking person I have ever seen... don't get why she's famous???

Friday, May 20, 2011

Die trying..

Good morning my little english muffin!

I've been searching for plane tickets to London (as well as new jobs), and everything is nearly $1000. Obviously out of my price range at the moment, but I am looking for restaurant work or something to make a bit more money. If all goes well, I'm hoping to save enough to come see you sometime this summer.

Another option is to see if there is a euro-city we could meet in that might be cheaper to get to. I would still have to save up, but perhaps not as much. I don't know. Ideally Florence would be cheaper, but it's not. I'm thinking, I'm thinking!

On another note, have you heard that the world is ending? I guess if that's the case, I won't be making it to London by Sunday, 6 pm. I wonder where Mr. God will send us?

I'm not sure if our shared love for Aubrey Beardsley/ Salome/ Aestheticism has anything to do with it, but I'm not sure Sunday's judgmental God would appreciate it. Ooooo well! Here's a lovely little painting by a lovely little man named Michelangelo. Judgement Day doesn't seem so bad...

Thursday, May 19, 2011


So pleased you are back, Spy 2.  I am so sorry about your job.  That is BAD.  I hate them.  How dare they.  As consolation I think that the universe should hand you a free, or perhaps hugely discounted flight to London, and my arms and the English puff that I now have the pleasure of inhabiting.

I miss you so much.  It's horrible.  Today I went to the Victoria & Albert museum to see an exhibit about my 19th Century homies, the Aesthetes.  There was some amazing stuff there, including many Rossettis AND illustrations by Beardsley.  I'm not so sure if you have been exposed to the genius of Aubrey Beardsley, but if not, I'll start off your new obsession:

He was great friends with Oscar Wilde and illustrated Salome, and probably more of his stories.  I love him.  I thought of you.

I feel lonely and aimless without Spy One.  My beautiful flat is going to waste as you have not been able to experience it.  London cries.  WOW this has been a... melancholy post.  I think it's because the sun is setting while I write this.  

Wednesday, May 18, 2011

Absence makes the heart grow fonder...

... or forgetful? I hope not. And I sincerely apologize for the one-sided conversation. So here goes my triumphant return into your life and the life of this blog!

First of all, the stars you've seen are a bit mind-boggling, and I'm not exactly sure how to respond. 




I can't possibly stay in New York when all of this is happening. Please keep your eyes open for cheap plane tickets. 

Which leads me to $$$... I have none. My job gets worse everyday. Despite the many requests from my colleagues, there is one woman and one woman only who REFUSES to give me more than 26 hrs/wk. That's not even full part-time! Blarf. Serves me right for working there for 7 years? I think not. 

The upshot is that I'm pretty much in a position to do anything (except for the whole not having money thang, and the whole work visa thing, and the whole paying rent thing etc.) If you have any ideas tell me, of course. If Stephan Fry asks you if you know of any outstanding American girls who would like to be his joke-tester-outers-on, you know who to call. 

In good news, I have a record player now. So, once again, keep your eyes open for kickass british vinyl. I'm slowly lugging my dad's record collection to the city, but many of them are scratched. New hobby, new life. 

I also went to the Dominican Republic and never told you about it. Paradise on Earth. Every hour was rum o'clock. We broke a jacuzzi, but it really wasn't our fault (shotty construction). Many waterfalls, rum, horses, rum, beach chairs, rum, palm trees, massages, rum rum, fully catered, lots of rum, flora, rum, fauna, rum, sea urchins, COCK FIGHTS, RUM RUM RUM! 

You get the idea? 

I must get back to work now. Not that they deserve it. If not triumphant, I hope this return was at least satisfactory. I love you, Spy tou! 

Thursday, May 5, 2011

i am dissappointed

I talked to John Paul Jones tonight at the river cafe.  He is displeased with your neglect of this blog.
Can you sense his angst and displeasure?